Sorry for my inactivity, really. I don't have much energy at the moment.
School began on September 5 for me. Third and last year of high school... And I'll be done with that. I think I'll start to truly feel better inside when I'll be done with school and start my studies. Well, won't fill my inner emptiness, won't make me a truly likeable person, but whatever... One bad thing will be gone, and it will be better this way. It's not like I'm truly emotional at the moment anyway. I feel pretty much 'shut down'.
I hope I'll have some energy this month to post something... I mainly posted GuP fanart on Pixiv in August, though. It's been a week or so since I haven't finished one single drawing. It will get better, I hope.
I can't say I'm at my best emotionally. I pretty much feel empty and tired, as if my life had lost all of the meaning it used to have, and I'm not sure if it ever had one. But well... as always, I'll get over it... if I've survived this long, I can survive longer. Won't surrender. Surrendering is shameful, and I don't want to be an even worst person that I already feel like I am. People like me don't deserve to stay alive, but I still don't want to give up. I'm the only person who is such bad in my mind. Strange feeling, huh? I both want to definitely cut myself off this world, while I want to live as well... I don't wanna actually die, I think. I just want to get away from everything, everyone, every emotion, every sensation, every thought, in the darkest of rooms. I wonder what would happen if I became suddenly invisible, though... Huh, so many questions in my head.
Don't worry too much about me. I'll be fine probably soon. As always, I'll get through this shit. If I can do it a thousand times, I still can do it.